Me Soho are Nay

The state of AmareCan culture must relax to fit the realities in which we live. The big take away from this social networking revolution is that everyone is banging everyone. It makes sense, since we all arrived upon this earth by way of two sweaty animals that you call Parents rocked and knocked the Boots-and at least One of them had an Orgasm.
We are so insecure with our own sexuality in this country that we lie to ourselves and say that we can do things the same as “in the good ol days.”
Lemme tell you about the good ol days… In the 30’s they had basic blood tests, which were performed long before Maury Povich had a tv show, and by looking back through those records we find that 1 in 4 children were fathered by someone else than who raised them. Maybe this study just happened to be a bunch of Grandma-Ho’s but that’s a bit staggering when you have this squeaky clean image of our past.
People Bang. That is why we are here. If you put a General in a room with a cute younger lady who’s job it is to write about how awesome his life is, chances are he’s gonna smash it, even if it does ruin his career and every political ambition he has.
All of his accolades and accomplishments are worthless now, simply because he wanted some sticky icky. Ooh wee.
Same as the politician that TwitPic’d his Weiner. I don’t recall his name right now, but I remember him being a smart man, who was undeserving of the press attention that he got. It was prolly his fault. He should have just Owned it. Went to the press conference and been like- “Yes, that was my hog leg in the picture, if there are anymore questions about it, please address them to it Directly.”

All the hell I got for being in a robe at a church I was planning on cleaning up-and my biggest crime? Being “naked.” You would think that I killed a bunch of school children before passing out on a pile of methamphetamine.

I get it, we hold those in the public eye to a higher standard than the regular populace, but I hope to survive to a day where our egos don’t run the world, and our individual insecurity about our nakedness and sexuality let us martyr other humans for the same thing that we do.

Don’t even get me started about how Anti-gay politicians always get caught cruising Twinks at bath houses. We are all Humans, we all deserve to be left to Live and Love, without the Salem Witch Trials. Ok, please excuse me while I conquer my third Pinay in a Starbucks bathroom.

Chill America. Lets move forward. Preferably Naked.